Why March is the absolute worst month
March sucks. I hate March. Everyone on social media is off fawning about how wonderful it is that spring has finally arrived, but here's the thing: March is not the start of spring. March is just a horrible cockblock of last winter blues, mixed with the worst of spring pollen. March is awful. Here are just some of the reasons why.
It is cold, dark, and rainy - which makes it still winter. We still have the heating on in our house and I am still sleeping in my winter pyjamas and under 4 (yes, four) whole blankets. And somehow, the fact that March is supposed to be the first month of spring makes the fact that it's still winter that much harder to swallow.
And yet, somehow, the pollen count has increased. I don't know if the fact that it's still windy and rainy makes the pollen spread even more than it does in the warmer, dryer spring months - but every March my hayfever kicks in with a vengeance and I feel like my sinuses will fall out of my head every time I leave my house. You know what isn't attractive? Red, swollen eyes, constant snot flow, and never-ending sneezing. Maybe there are people who are into that, but I am not one of them nor have I ever met one. May and June are much nicer months and I would just like to skip March until we get to them, thanks.
It's too far away from any holidays. The buzz of the Christmas holidays has now completely faded away, but it still feels so far away from the April bank holiday and the proper start to taking vacations to warm, sunny places - ignoring, obviously, the fact that 2021 means holidays will probably be postponed till summer anyway (praying that I can still travel home for Easter. Literally praying).
What in the fuck is there to do in March, anyway? Yes, the days are getting longer - but you still need to be completely bundled up when you leave the house, which makes it too cold to meet people outside or go to pub gardens, which will soon be the only legally accepted ways to socialize.
There's hardly any good sport in March. Traditionally March is a bit of a dead zone for the sports I like - only two weekends of Six Nations rugby, all the cup games in the French league mean my team tends to do badly in the league run, and the Champions' League return legs games are always, always disappointing.
March is a bit of a dip for exciting book releases. My experience is I always love books that come out in summer and November - the books that are released in March are never the big-hitters from the big publishing houses, and I feel new releases that I've read in March are always a bit of a gamble. There are a few coming out this month that I'm hoping buck that trend, but I do have some trepidations from a long experience of publishing history.
So there you have it - March is the worst and should get right in the sea. On the other hand, it's an excuse to stay inside for the next thirty days and read as many books as I possibly can while eating all of the snacks, so I suppose it does all come out in the wash.
Happy reading indoors and away from all the bloody pollen,
Amélie
